I am the Large Hadron Collider of hip hop.

Stumbled upon this earlier today, it seems that when the folks at CERN aren’t too busy trying to kill us all with tiny black holes they’re laying down phat rhymes over funky beats. Not down with the LHC? Fool. It’s the Large Hadron Collider, the largest particle collider ever built. So large is crosses the border between France and Switzerland and its contruction involves the efforts of scientists all over the world, including parts from Fermilabs here in the USA. Scientists predict it will answer some of the most boggling questions about the nature of the universe, as well as shed some light on the behaviors of particles that exist for such a short time they practically don’t exist. The LHC could prove the existence of the Higgs Boson which has yet to be observed, but the current model of physics accounts for. And if it doesn’t? We’d have to totally rethink our understanding of physics! Either way, the discovery would change the way we think (and possibly live!) forever!

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Look at zem. Zey are so TINY. Zey do naaaahhtheeeng!

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Michio Kaku. Theoretical physicist, Japanese man, and a fun-loving guy who likes to freak people out with scientific doomsday scenarios every now and then.

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…he then turns his back and wrings his hands wildly, his laugh rising to a menacing crescendo.

But first, CERN has to finish the damn thing. Since its start, the LHC has seen some setbacks which include a malfunction of one of the focusing magnets during a stress tests. On top of that, apparently people are little worked up over the whole ‘micro black hole’ thing and are trying to get the LHC shut down. For fear it will destroy the world. Theoretical physicist and Bemused Soothsayer Michio Kaku assures us it will do no such thing. He says the same to those who claim the particle collisions will produce particle combinations called strangelets which would turn any matter they touch into strangelets as well. Personally I’m more worried about gray goo.

Anyway. Until its unveiling this October, sit back with some gin and juice and elucidate yourself on the workings of this supercollider, Schoolhouse Rock style. PEACE!!

CERN Rap from Will Barras on Vimeo.